#75 - Get in the Room: Upleveling Confidence and Creating Quantum Leaps

You ever walk into a room and instantly feel like you don’t belong?

Like everyone else has it more together, more figured out, more polished?

Well... what if I told you that feeling might actually be your invitation to uplevel?

In this solo episode, I’m sharing three powerful stories about how proximity, group energy, and saying yes to the right rooms can radically shift your confidence and your business trajectory. From a chance connection in the Catskills to a bold moment at a Florida conference, this episode invites you to reflect on how you're showing up—and what's holding you back.

📝 Journal Prompts to Explore:
→ What is it that I actually want?
→ What version of me already has it?
→ What would I need to believe today to take one bold step toward her?

🎯 Ready to get in the room?
Today’s the day to lock in the Earlybird rate for SummerCamp ($397). Book a call with me today to hold your rate—even if you’re not ready to say yes yet.
🔗 Book your clarity call here

AND - if you ARE ready - CLICK HERE and secure your EarlyBird rate for this 7-week project-focused container that's guaranteed to help you level up your business this Summer. 

Let’s move through the upper limits and into bold, aligned action—together. 💫

Mindset to Market is a Luminous Creative Production. If you'd like to learn more about our business coaching program and group coaching container, please visit us online at DeborahcSmith.com.

20% Off Sakara Plant-Based Meal Program
Use code DEBSAKARA at checkout for 20% OFF your first order with Sakara Life.

Email Marketing: Start FREE with KIT
Join the Creator Network on KIT and create life-long fans and customers!

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Mindset to Market is produced by Deborah C. Smith and designed to inspire and support big-hearted creatives in finding their own unique path, building a sustainable business, and creating financial, spiritual, mental wellness and abundance.

🎉 Join the Mindset to Market Coaching Mastermind ​Learn More
💕 Visit Deborah online at DeborahCSmith.com
💕 Follow on the 'Gram. @mindset2marketpod

Transcript

 You ever walk into a room and instantly feel like you don't belong like everyone else has it more together, has it more figured out? They're more polished. Maybe everyone else has the right outfit, hair and nails, or they have more clients or they have more experience selling. Well, what if I told you that that feeling might actually be your invitation to up level?

In this episode, we're talking about upper limiting yourself and dimming your own light. Okay? We're gonna talk about the power of shifting your self perception and the tools that you have access to right now to do that. And I'm gonna share a story about being perceived as intimidating by someone who I actually deeply admired and what it taught me about self-perception, confidence, and the hidden power of group work.

So if you've ever felt like you're standing outside the room, you know you're meant to be in. This one is for you. Let's get into it. Hey there, and welcome to the Mindset To Market Podcast, your go-to place for practical tools and solutions for the everyday challenges of being a creative and spiritual solopreneur living in a material world.

I'm your host. Deborah Smith. I'm a holistic business coach with 17 years of experience, and I help my clients bust through mindset blocks and build a daily practice that prioritizes your business's financial growth as well as your personal health and wellness. I'm here to offer you support, creativity, mindset, practical how-tos, and getting into imperfect messy actions so you can find balance while building the.

Business. If you're a purpose-driven solopreneur who's working on that dream one day at a time, then you're in the right place. Let's dive in. Hey, beautiful solopreneurs. I see you out there doing the work, taking risks, overcoming all the many insufferable challenges of trying to share your thing with your audience and your future clients.

Amidst. Truly daunting, real world circumstances that we are currently facing, so yes indeed. Welcome back to the show. I'm dropping in today with another solo episode. And it's all about the power of proximity, the people, the rooms, the circles that can catalyze a breakthrough in your business and your confidence.

So it's a little bit about networking, a little bit about just relationships, but it's a lot about self-confidence. And my goal is to give you a shot in the arm of confidence as well as some clarity. On how you can take simple, immediate action towards both your personal and your business goals, right?

And they really go hand in hand. So let me tell you a story. A few months ago I met a local woman where I live upstate in the Catskills. I live about two hours north of the city right now. She's a very powerful, grounded, deeply intuitive woman. And we had known each other for a while, but we wound up in a conversation and I was learning more about her.

Um, and she's a healer. She works with energy. She has a Reiki two practitioner, she's a massage therapist. And I instantly started feeling like she would be the perfect partner for like a solopreneur retreat that I've been dreaming up, right? So I have this idea of hosting an event up here. Up outta the city.

Something that's one part business like upleveling, one part nature immersion, you know, nourishing food, healing modalities, connections, the whole full body, yes. Kind of retreat. I planted the seed and then we finally had a conversation about it just a few days ago, and when we sat down to talk, she told me something really unexpected.

She had looked at my Instagram before we met. She looked at my website and she admitted that she felt intimidated by me. She told me that she saw my profile and immediately was like, oh wow, she's really doing all the things. And then that made her think consequently that she wasn't doing enough. Right.

So she had set an upper limit for herself immediately comparing, doubting, and really shrinking her own power. Meanwhile, I'm sitting here looking at her thinking, wow, this woman is a force. She's really got it together. I was craving her very grounded, earthy magic as potentially a great compliment to my business strategy and fire, right?

So we have this beautiful, honest conversation about self-perception and how often our. Fears run the show for us. Like we really let upper limits sneak in. We silence ourselves before we even open the door and peek inside. But here is the truth. Your next breakthrough in your business is not gonna come from isolation.

It's, it's not gonna come from you holding back and waiting for the right moment. And it's definitely not gonna come from you letting your fear of what. People doubting you or fear of failure running the show for you. It's going to come from being in the room with the women who see your brilliance, even when you don't.

And I actually have lots of stories from this year where this has shown up in my own life and my own business. Uh, I think I mentioned a couple of episodes back if you've been listening, that I determined that this year I was gonna try and do one in-person networking event every single month of the calendar year, because that.

Felt like where I was gonna be meeting the right people, and it feels really overwhelming. It feels intimidating to me. Honestly. There's been more fear involved than confidence because it is really hard to get on a plane and fly to the town and go to a conference by yourself. But I, I had to force myself to do it because I believe that I have work to do helping other women.

Grow their businesses and make money. I can't do that work if I don't connect with more women, right? So I have to do it. So in January, I did a solo trip to Florida from New York. I went to a a a pod. Casting, uh, conference, and I met tons of people in that room, those rooms, several of whom who have become clients of mine.

And yesterday I had the opportunity to actually interview one of those women who's now a client of mine, who's having these incredible breakthroughs in our own business. And we had this amazing conversation about how, if. If she and I had not taken the risk and put ourselves on those planes and gotten into that room in Florida, we would never have met.

And now both of our businesses are. Unfolding in such beautiful ways because of working together. So I'm, I'm excited to share the conversation I had with that client. Her name's Tiff Carson that we did the interview yesterday, so it'll probably be, you know, it could be a month from now before I, but I share it.

But it just really showed me an example of like, if I hadn't taken the risk, I never would've met her. We never would've connected. And, and, and the magic that's happening between us is such a huge part of my business growth story and hers. And I've had similar experiences with all of these in-person networking and group programs that I've joined since the beginning of this year, just since the beginning of this year.

I've been in business for 18 years. This commitment to get into rooms with people who I perceive as doing more better, and you know, just feeling like they're ahead of me has been so powerful. It's vulnerable for sure, but it's definitely working to unlock parts of me that I. I was shutting down. Uh, another great example is earlier this year, I went to participate in the Rich Girl Conference in Florida.

First of all, you guys, I am obsessed with Britt. Uh, Brittany Hahn. Britt Hahn, who runs this conference, and there's another one coming up in August. Um, message me if you're interested in details about that, but. I was intimidated just even by the name of the conference, the Rich Girl Conference. I make good money, but I was like, well, I'm not a rich girl.

I just shut myself down without even getting in that room. And then I get there and I walk into a ballroom of these just beautiful, confident. These women dressed in really bold colors, and everyone's got beautiful suits and they're dripping in conviction. And for a moment, I genuinely felt like I didn't belong.

But guess what? I stayed in the room. I sat in the discomfort, I leaned in, I listened. I connected one person at a time with people who I'd never known before, and I truly left that room feeling. Changed because their energy cracked something open in me. And the specific thing was that every other person in that room felt exactly the same as me.

It didn't matter how old they were, there was women there from ages, early twenties, all the way to mid to late sixties. Everyone was showing up, like trying to look and do their best, and every single woman felt like maybe she didn't belong in that room yet. Every single one. I didn't speak to anyone who didn't say admit to their own vulnerability.

Even some of these women were like way ahead, technically in the game in terms of earning money and having served clients, right? Because really if you're thinking about. What you're doing with your online business, whatever you do, like I don't, it doesn't matter. If you have a knitting program and you teach women to knit, or if you're a coach that works in the business industry, or if you're a beautician who cuts hair and does nails, it's all about.

Connecting with your right people, your tribe, your audience, and serving them and doing a great job, doing what you are passionate about and helping people have a transformation in their lives. And so no matter what you're doing with your business, it really is about connecting with people, growing an audience and serving clients.

And that's what your growth is gonna look like. And so it really does make a difference to get into these rooms. And I just have one more quick story about this, where I had a breakthrough on the same level. A couple of weeks ago, I discovered a woman's online Instagram profile who had basically the exact same business name that I use, uh, for my production company, which is Luminous Creative.

And I read her bio and it was literally almost the exact same. As mine, like it was one or two words were different, but it was like her description of who she is, what she does, and who she serves was like identical to mine. And I remember feeling immediately, I assumed she must be the one that gets to have that name and that description.

Like we can't both have it. So it must be her that gets to have it, uh, because she has it. So did I copy her? Did she copy me? And I was immediately intimidated. Right? Why? I don't know. But that's just what we do. So, but because I'm in the practice of feeling the fear and doing it anyways, I decided to reach out to her and I said in my message, I, I sent her a DM and I said, Hey, um, we have almost the same business name and description and it made me want to learn more about You wanna meet up?

Uh, with me. And so we set a coffee date and you guys, this was such an amazing conversation. First of all, this woman, and I don't even do the same thing, that was the first breakthrough. Like she is a technical web designer. I do not design websites. I coach women to unlock their signature offer. And strategically map out the funnel from the point of view of the messaging and the right way to sell.

I don't actually design websites, so it was so fascinating. We had chosen almost the exact same business name, almost the exact same way to describe ourselves, and we are doing. Totally different things for our clients, and in fact, guess what? We can work together and share clients. I can send her clients who need their website designed, she can send me clients who haven't mapped out their strategic plan of of action yet.

So it was just like this amazing breakthrough. To connect with this woman and, and, and I'm like, instead of feeling like, oh no, I have to change my business name, it was like, oh wow. I found a colleague and a, a peer who I can collaborate with. And so that wouldn't have happened if I hadn't reached out to her.

So again, we're gonna talk a little bit more about overcoming these upper limits that we feel and taking actions that dismantle these fear-based thoughts that we all have. So we need to talk about what actually creates the quantum leap in your confidence and your business. So I put together a a little toolkit to share with you and for each of these, you know, I've got full episodes that go a lot deeper into the subject matter, but I just wanna give you some thoughts for today.

And then I've got some. Questions that you can actually use to journal on and really get more clear about this. So always, and I think obviously, but sometimes people don't actually use this tool, is the power of visualization. Seeing yourself in the room, seeing yourself at the table on the stage speaking, repeat that until it feels real for yourself.

So oftentimes we don't see ourselves in the space, and that's part of it. So what you can do is you can literally print out a picture of a bunch of women standing in or sitting at the table in the room you wanna be in, and then stick a picture of yourself on top of it, like, I'm not even kidding. Cut and paste yourself into the room and look at it.

Condition your nervous system to feel what it feels like to see yourself in the room. It will actually change and shift. What you believe is possible for yourself. The power of visualization cannot be underestimated. And I'm actually gonna do another episode on this. I did a great episode on vision boards.

I. And to be specific, it's episode 35. It's called How to Make a New Moon Vision Board, if you wanna go back and listen to that. Um, it's a great episode. It, it's really just how to make a vision board. But I like doing that on the New Moon. But I just wanna share that many of my clients who are using this.

Tool of visualization are experiencing quick breakthroughs on and progress in their businesses. And it's overwhelmingly true that when you visualize something, it comes much quicker. So visualization is a great tool. The next is mantra, like sort of daily affirmations and just neurolinguistic practices, right?

So simple empowering phrases in the present tense as if you've already achieved your goal. Um, but you could, for this particular case, say things like, I belong here. I'm ready now. There is no one else like me, so I should be in this room. I'm here for a reason that those types of positive, present tense affirmations can again help to condition your nervous system and shift your brain, your powerful supercomputer of a brain into believing that it's the right time and overcome those fears that want to tell you that it's not the right time.

And community, of course, another great tool. Surround yourself with other bold women. Join programs. Get into free Facebook groups, masterminds, summits. Attend events where other people are being brave and then normalize. The practice of being more bold and brave with your ideas and your work. This stuff takes practice.

Like it's not gonna happen overnight. So just really start building community in your own way. Maybe even open your own community, right? Maybe even start your own Facebook group. Um, and then another great tool, and I love this one, is just ask yourself better questions. So instead of asking yourself or you know, saying, am I good enough, or do I have what it takes?

Those are fear-based questions, right? And fear never gives us helpful answers. So instead, what I want you to do is try the following questions and these, you can hit pause if you want to and get out a pen, or I'm gonna put these in the show notes so you can just copy and paste them. So instead, try asking yourself, what is it that I actually want?

What is it that I actually want and what version of me already has it? What does she look like? What would I need to believe today to take one bold step forward to becoming her? Because here's the thing, so many of us stay stuck, not because we don't know what to do. We know what to do. You're already an expert and a genius at what you are passionate about and know you know what to do.

But because we're letting old thoughts run the show, right, we're letting fear. Run the show. So thoughts like, I don't wanna seem like I'm too much. What if I fail publicly? What will they think of me? What, what are people gonna think of me if I launch this thing and it doesn't sell? I've a bad and good news for you.

You're gonna launch the thing and it's really highly likely that the first time you launch it will be a flop. I don't know anybody who didn't have a first flop. Like you have to have a first failed launch to have a next really good one. So. Your next level. And your next level self. She is asking better questions.

She's focused on possibility, not permission. She's thinking, what if this does work? What would my life look like if I, if this works? And she's willing to move even with a little fear in her pocket, right? Even with a little bit of self doubt, she's gonna say, I see you self-doubt. I'm putting you on the back.

Shelf. I'm putting you on the back seat. Put, I'm snapping you into your, your seat back there, and you can be back there, but you're not driving this car. Okay. The future version of me who is worth achieving these goals and who's putting in all this work because she knows that she's worthy of the results, which is, you know, being seen as valuable, being seen as worthy by others, uh, being hired by clients and paid your high value worth.

All of that comes with believing in that future version of yourself and asking better questions. Okay. And then last one is group work. The shared energy of group work is so powerful. This could be a group coaching program. This could be a retreat that you attend, a networking event, a conference, um, it could be coworking sessions, which is something that I do inside a lot of my programs.

The shared experience that you have, being a part of a group collapses time. So what would take you months to work through alone can shift into a simple weekend, sometimes a few hours, right? So when you work inside of a group, you're not only doing the work and being seen and held accountable, but you're also seeing how other people approach the work and getting ideas and short cutting because you're seeing a faster, quicker, better way to do it.

You're sharing. These assets that you collectively. Grow together and it literally collapses time. So group work is such a powerful way to overcome fear and make quick progress, level up your self-confidence and level up your entire business game. So that brings me very easily to my summer camp program this summer.

Um, I've been talking about this a little bit, but not too much. If you're on my newsletter, I've been sending out lots of emails about it. So this is not just a bootcamp, it's actually a reset. It's, it's a chance for people to come together in a short term container. It's seven weeks long. It's a community, it's a catalyst.

And what we're doing is we're, we're combining powerful business strategy with deep inner alignment. It's a project focused program, so you're gonna get in there with one clear project that you want to accomplish over the summer. This could be finally launching a podcast. Um, for lots of people. Last summer, it was launching their newsletter that they're going to continually send out on a weekly basis and use it as a sales tool.

I. Um, one person who's coming into the container this, this summer already signed up, is creating a YouTube channel that she's been thinking about and dreaming about for like years. So the idea is that you, you choose one project that you have been dreaming of that is a business asset that's a long-term business asset, and you're gonna build it, shape it, and complete it.

Throughout this program. So you're gonna leave with a plan of action, but also the confidence to follow through once we're done. And so, because you're listening to this, I'm gonna offer you a gift, which is that you can use the code Solar one when you click the link in my show notes. If you're interested in summer camp and you wanna join, that's the early bird rate.

So. The entire program is open until the end of June for enrollment, but right now it is on Early Bird Sale. And you can lock that in by scheduling a call with me or just clicking the link and using the Code Solar one to get the early bird rate for the full Summer Camp Bootcamp experience. Um, I want you in that room, if you wanna be in that room, and even if you're feeling like you're not ready.

Take action and join us. It is a powerful group experience where you're gonna get something done. Trust me on that one. Um, I'm doing one-on-one strategy sessions with every single enrollee. There's not a lot of spaces because I have to be able to ensure, uh, that I can help every single person succeed. So, um, there's limited room and now's the time to join.

So take a step, take action. DM me with your questions, and if you not sure if it's right for you or if it's the right timing. Please book a session on my calendar, like a 15 minute conversation. I'll find out what you're working on. You'll get more clear on what the program container looks like, and it'll help you make a decision.

So. If you're feeling called, this is the time to take action so you can lock in a really good, um, early bird rate on this program. And the, the recap, you guys is really simply this. Don't let fear run your decision making around your business and around your life. The world is absolutely bonkers as crazy like.

Really, truly, there is a litany of reasons why we should feel nervous, scared, afraid to take action, afraid to take a risk. But if you have a dream and a vision for how you can impact people and make a difference in this world, and that looks like some version of a solopreneur business. Then it's doing yourself a disservice to let fear run the show.

And a powerful, powerful way to break out of that cage is to get into rooms and make these connections with other women who are doing the work. And even it could look as simple as just reaching out to somebody today on the internet. Or in person and saying, Hey, wanna have a coffee chat? I'm a business owner too.

Let's chat. Let's go for a walk together. There's so many ways you can break out of that isolating feeling that you're doing this all by yourself. You're not alone. And you should not be alone. I. So get into rooms. I hope you found this helpful. Um, as always, thanks to all those people who are leaving a rating and a review, you could do that by scrolling down to the bottom of wherever you're listening to this look for the stars, and it'll usually, there'll be a link.

Um, I know on Apple you have to be logged into your Apple Podcasts. Um, but you can just scroll down on Spotify or Apple and leave a rating or a review. It means the world to me. It's really hard to get a podcast out there and listened to. So please help me with that. And thank you in advance. Um, and I'll, I'll be back next week with a great interview with the one and only Jen Marilla.

She's an amazing business coach. Uh, I love her. And our conversation was really fun. So I can't wait to share that with you. And until next week, y'all, may you be vibrant.